Skateboarders Continue Strides Towards World Domination

Already innovators in the world of art, fashion, music and overall cultural influence, now a skateboarder is responsible for leading the country (and world) out of financial ruin. Why and I not surprised?

Timothy Geithner looks a lot younger than his 47 years (though not as young as he did before the crisis began). He skateboards and snowboards and exudes a sort of hipster-wonkiness, using “way” as a synonym for “very” as in “way consequential” and occasionally underlining his point with the word “fuck”. Showing his age, he refers to his favorite trick as the “360 Kickflip” and although he thinks they are waaay uncool, he can still throw down mean hand plants like Pharrell Williams. In temperament he seems similar to those like Barack Obama and Rodney Mullen: he is suspicious of ideology, questions received wisdom, likes a competition of ideas and is keenly aware of how uncertain the world is.

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